Or at least that appears to be the thesis of Wharton professor Adam Grant’s (relatively) new book Give and Take (2013). (Disclosure: I received a free copy from the publisher).
According to Professor Grant, giving, matching, and taking “are three fundamental styles of social interaction.” Givers give without thought of what they will get in return; givers are generous, other-focused, and give without keeping score. Matchers give expecting quid pro quo; matchers “believe in tit for tat…and believe in an even exchange of favors.” Takers give expecting a positive return; takers put “their own interests ahead of others’ needs.” (pgs. 4-5).
Grant is quick to admit that, “the lines between [giving, taking, and matching] are not hard and fast.” (pg. 5) Most of us fall somewhere in the middle, as more exacting or less exacting “matchers.”
In his book, Grant cites studies of medical students, engineers, salespeople, and others to support his thesis that the “worst performers and the best performers are givers; takers and matchers are more likely to land in the middle.” (pg. 7) (emphasis added). (While Grant cites a number of academic studies, this book is written for a popular audience.)
If “givers” end up at
